So, the other day I was hanging out with the fam and as is often the topic when you're edging towards thirty, the subject of my love life came up. My brother for some reason believes that I'm going to marry a white man. For my part, I have no problem with that. It's been so long since I had a date, I wouldn't care if he were green. Hell, I'm probably green.
Anyhoo, so whilst my brother and I were debating the merits of Interracial dating (FYI, he has 'issues' with Black women, but that's a post for a different time), my mother turns to me with a quizzical tilt of her head and quite seriously, she tells me, "You know, I don't see you married at all." My eyes widen and my jaw drops on to the floor as she continues "Oh, I think you're going to have kids but I don't think you're going to get married." Now this of course comes from a woman who tells me at least once a month that she has dreams of my getting married. Most of the time, I'm married to some Jewish doctor or a Canadian or some such conjuration of her imagination.
My brother and I stare at each other for a minute. He of course recovers quickly and burts into laughter. So I say to her (and please take this for the sarcastic commentary that it's meant to be) "So, what you're telling me is that you see me as a whore. Is that it? Am I to be yet another sad statistic? What you see me with four kids and five Baby Daddies? Is that what you're saying?"
My mom shrugs nonchalantly and says "No, I just don't think you're going to get married."
At that my friends is a mother's kind words.
Later
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3 comments:
Ah, the kind of pain only a mother can cause. My Mom tries the same thing, but as I've made it to three years past the age she was when she had me, I usually just shoot back into her face, "Ya know, you can say I'm making the same mistakes you did all you want. I'm not listening, because I'm not pregnant." Booh and Yah. Gotta have a comeback ready, they think they're right & you need to crush that illusion as quickly as possible.
As far as getting married, men are a hassle, no need to rush & end up with the wrong one. I think you'll find the right guy when you're ready to. However, I also think you're a little too wild as of yet, unless you find a guy equally up for exploration. If you do, find out if he has a brother for me?
Perhaps it was reverse psychology...
I agree with Jaye. Perhaps that was your mothers way of getting you to the wedding alter faster so that you can give her the grandchildren she wants. I'm a mom we do these things and pass them on to our children to use as it was passed down to us.
Regina
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